Election 2010: Moments of Joy

Of course, the results are still coming in, but here's a few things to savour from the election result:

• Jacqui Smith, the worst Home Secretary in living memory (and given how shit the most recent ones have been, that's quite an achievement) loses her seat. Guess you should have got your husband to pay for his own wank films, rather than expecting the taxpayer to do so.
• Lembit Opik, a man most famous for who he knobs rather than anything political - and a man who was implicated in the expenses scandal - is out of Parliament.
• Charles Clarke, draconian former Home Secretary and all round horse's arse, is also seeking alternative employment today.
• Esther Rantzen made a complete dick of herself in her pointless campaign.

Yes, I wish Balls had been booted out too, but you can't have everything. Besides, his survival will make the coming Labour leadership election even more bitter and divisive...

UPDATE

Via the comments section, The Moai points out that the BNP has taken a good kicking across the nation. Which is awesome.

And George Galloway was also bitch-slapped...

Things that I never thought would happen

Apologies for the lack of activity on here of late. I have been knocked out by a nasty illness that had a lot of the symptoms of the 'flu but clearly wasn't the 'flu*.

Along with the phrase "and pigs might fly", I thought the phrase "and Lembit Opik appears in Hello with a third rate pop singer" was a rock solid way of expressing the absolutely impossible. How wrong I was.

I don't know whether he will ever warrant one, but whoever does become Lembit Opik's auto-biographer should have a whale of a time. What with his valiant fight for Spaceguard, his compelling defence of Charles Kennedy this time last year and his sterling support of Mark Oaten** coupled with his love of weather girls and the musically challenged, Opik's life should make for a compelling research project.

*Can't have been the 'flu. I had a 'flu jab less than a month ago. And I refuse to believe that I went through the trauma of having a flu jab (bearing in mind I hate needles) only to get the sodding illness a few weeks later.

**Come on, to be the only one out of 52 MPs supporting Oaten shows a certain dedication.