Jokes 'n' Stuff

An interesting and really quite good weekend has left me feeling oddly centred and content. Even the mad, sweaty woman in the pub on Sunday night (she wanted to be taken to Chiswick - no mean feat given we were in Wimbledon at the time) didn't really bother me. So I am not really in mood for the boggle-eyed, foaming mouthed profane ranting that normally makes up this blog. If you want such misanthropic malice, I would suggest a quick look at this post, which tears into Patsy Hewitt with a vitriol that is breath-taking, offensive, and - given the target - utterly, utterly, utterly deserved.

So instead I thought I would share a joke told to me by an old friend.

David Bowie, Mick Jagger and Iggy Pop have all passed on. Owing to a clerical error, the sins committed as part of their rock 'n' roll lifestyles are ignored and they are all considered worthy of Heaven. After dying they ascend into the clouds and stand, waiting, at the Pearly Gates. St Peter is there, at the gates, checking people off very slowly as they walk into paradise.

David, Mick and Iggy are all used to people who fawn over them and worship them. So they all find it a little difficult to wait in a long queue. However, they rationalise it and decide that getting into the kingdom of Heaven is probably worth waiting for. So they stand in the queue, patiently awaiting their turn.

Then they see Bono completely ignore the queue and walk up to the Pearly Gates. The gates swing open, and Bono walks straight into Heaven. This outrages the three rock stars and when they finally reach the front of the queue, an irate Bowie asks St Peter why Bono is allowed to jump the queue.

St Peter replies:

"That's not Bono, that's God. He just thinks he's Bono."

Well, it made me laugh.