Look at the talkbox, with renewed frustration

I have been trying to avoid Celebrity Big Brother in a way that resembles someone trying to avoid a virulent stomach plague. My flatmates watch it, so I evacuate the living room in plenty of time before it comes on. People talk about it at work, so I use my selective hearing and tune out from the Big Brother chat. And I blank all tabloid front pages at the moment (which is no bad thing, generally speaking), as I have no burning desire to see the latest exclusives from the house.

However, despite my best attempts to bury my head in the sand and hope this winter bout of Big Brother goes by without affecting me, one story has attracted my attention. Yep, it is the Shilpa vs Jade saga.

Jade Goody's behaviour has shown her to be the sort of reprehensible idiot I always thought she was. From what I have seen and read, she comes across as ignorant, uneducated, boorish and utterly odious. The sort of person you would cross the street to avoid. However, taking all that into account, I am not sure she is a racist.

Sure, comments like "Shilpa Poppadom" would suggest otherwise, and I wonder whether Goody would have the same antipathy to Shetty if she was white. But I rather suspect she would. Because the problem Jade has with Shetty is best illustrated by having a look at the pictures over at Mr Eugenides - put simply, Shetty is a strikingly attractive and successful actor. Goody is a rotund cross between trailer trash and a warthog - famous for being famous and nothing else. Goody is just plain jealous of Shetty, and because she is so stupid and so poorly educated Goody cannot express her feelings in anything other than violent arguments and ignorant comments. If you want a racist, look no further than wannabe footballer's wife Danielle Lloyd, who has come out with such gems as "She should f*** off home. She can’t even speak English.” (A charge that could be levelled at both Ms Lloyd and Ms Goody...) Goody is jealous, pure and simple. But not racist.

I don't know how much damage this debacle will do to Big Brother, or to Endemol, or even to Channel Four but I think the debate will rumble on for a while yet. So all I will add is this - Big Brother and then Celebrity Big Brother have given a weak, stupid and ignorant person a national platform to speak and be heard. So they really shouldn't be fucking surprised when said weak, stupid and ignorant person says stupid, ignorant and unpleasant things.