*Pretty* Polly

As advertised on the Kitchen, last night saw the frankly farcical sight of Polly Toynbee addressing the Conservative Bow Group. Yep, that’s right – the arch Social Democrat (or socialist, if you will), the Brown lover, the pie in the sky leftie that is Polly Toynbee addressed a Conservative meeting last night. It would be surreal, if it wasn’t so tragic.

I was there, along with DK, Trixy and Jackart. Sat in the corner of Committee Room Six in the Commons. To say there was more than a little hostility from our corner towards the *esteemed* speaker would be an understatement. But that’s not to say that it was simply anger we were directing at her. There was also quite a bit of pointing and laughing.

I was going to do a detailed analysis and critique of what Toynbee had to say, and her answers to the questions put to her, but I won’t. Simply because that would take too long, because, frankly, everything she said was wrong. Instead, I’ll just make a couple of points about some of the more egregiously crappy things that she said.

Firstly, Polly talked about redistribution of wealth and evening out the differences in society. She cited the Scandinavian example(s), where the consultant in a hospital earns a similar amount to the person cleaning the floors. Hmmmm…. Well, I don’t support redistribution of wealth, I think it is wrong to punish people for being successful and prosperous. But actually it is more fundamental than that. The consultant in the hospital who is going to operate on someone’s brain frankly should earn a hell of a lot more than the person wiping up shit in the corridor. He has more specialist skills and he has a far higher pressure job than the cleaner mopping up outside the operating theatre. What is wrong with rewarding people for doing a technical, specialist jobs? Can you really, really claim that the work done by the cleaner is as challenging and difficult as the work done by the consultant? And worth as much? Because if you can, you are a total twat.

Also, Polly claimed that people’s fear of tax rises was based around a fear of losing CEOs, as has occurred in her beloved Scandinavia. Erm, no, Polly. I couldn’t give a flying fuck where CEOs live. They can reside on the arsing moon for all I care. My dislike of tax rises is more based on my fear of the government wasting even more of my hard earned money on crap policies and crap schemes. And I don’t think I am alone in this – witness the Tory victory in 1992 General Election after the Labour party revealed their tax and spend plans. If the government cannot efficiently use the tax revenue they currently raise, then why on earth would anyone want to give them more money to waste?

And there is something very interesting about the way in which Polly views society and the success of individuals within that society. It seems to be purely based on earnings. The problem seems to be that the highest earners net so much more than the lowest earners. Success is based on how much money you earn. Well, personally, I rate success in life on more than just salary. Sure, I earn more than the median salary quoted by Pol last night. But not massive amounts more – and I certainly don’t earn anywhere near as much as those CEOs who seem to cause Polly such consternation. And you know what? I don’t care. Frankly those who act as CEOs deserve the money they earn. They pretty much give their lives to their jobs, and work exceptionally hard in high pressure roles that I know I could not cope with and have no interest in. They earn their money, Pol, and good luck to them.

Polly’s argument is not even based on class envy anymore – it is greed, it is based on jealously of salaries. Personally I am not greedy and vacuous enough to see money as the route of all happiness and success in their life. And I pity those who, as Polly seems to do, worship money above all else.

The end result of Toynbee’s ideas and policies is equality – everyone is equally miserable. Because as far as I can see she is not a Social Democrat, but rather a good ol’ table thumping, Red Flag waving, socialist. She proposes the great levelling – the government intervenes until everyone is earning the same. End any aspirations for individuals – no matter how hard you try, you will end up the same as the waster sat next to you on the train because, no matter what happens, no-one can be left behind.

Ultimately, as Jackart controversially noted last night, the socialist/social democratic countries may outstrip the UK in many of the parameters that Polly finds important, but they also beat us in another, unarguably bad, category.

They are better at suicide.