The Next Superman Movie

The options from a poll in The Times* about a new Superman movie is worth looking at, (especially if you are a comic book geek like me). If only because the options are so awful.


Just let the big guy rest a while. No Superman movie for a few years.
Yeah, whilst this may be the best option offered by this poll, it just isn't going to happen. With the massive success of The Dark Knight and Iron Man, anything that comes from a comic book is in vogue and will probably get the greenlight to go ahead by the money-hungry people in Hollywood.


A straight follow-up to the Singer/Routh movie.
One small problem with this idea - the Singer/Routh movie was dull. It was really, really boring. I never realised just how boring Superman could be until I saw that movie. Even Superman IV: The Quest for Peace (as pious and crap as it was) managed to be entertaining. Not so much Superman Returns. Long before the end of that movie my attention was not just elsewhere, but anywhere other than on the movie I was meant to be watching.


A big screen outing for Smallville.
That series only just works on the small screen. There is no way, particularly with all the years of continuity behind it, that it would work in cinemas.


Darkness in Metropolis. A Chris Nolan Superman.

No. Don't be dumb. Darkness works well for Batman - he is, after all, a vigilante with post-traumatic stress disorder. But Superman is a light hearted superhero. Making him dark is to completely miss the point of the character and what has made previous Superman movies so enjoyable.

Which, for me, is the point. A Superman movie should be big, brash and dumb. Forget the darkness, forget making it worthy or realistic. Just make it fun. It is about a man who can fly and who has a stupid kiss curl in his hair. Intellect and worthiness are not good matches for a Superman movie. It needs to be fast-paced, enjoyable and light-hearted.

So a memo to the makers of the Next Superman movie: make it fun**.

*Can't seem to get a direct link for it, but it is attached to this entertaining article here.
**And if you want someone to write the script for you, I'll do it. For a very reasonable rate. I've got an idea for it and all.