The Wedding of River Song: Some Predictions

Some people love a bit of speculation when it comes to the next adventures of the nation’s favourite Time Lord. Others hate it. Some see it as ruining the surprise. Others see it as pointless geek speculation. Now, if you fall into the latter two camps, this post is not for you. Away you go until tomorrow, when (all being well) the review of The Wedding of River Song will arrive. But for all of those in the former camp, welcome to a bit of speculation about how one of the best seasons in the show’s history will be wrapped up.

First up, let’s do the easy bit. Rory and Amy will be back. Hell, they were even in the episode after the one that was meant to mark their departure from the TARDIS. And we’re going to see other familiar faces returning for the finale. River Song (obviously), Kovarian, the Silence and Winston Churchill. Oh, and at least one Dalek. That much can be gathered from the trailer. Charles Dickens will also be back.

What we have also seen a lot of is that footage of River Song wearing an eye patch, in the style of Madame Kovarian. Does this mean that River disguises herself as Kovarian? Or that she, in some way, becomes Kovarian? And in the prequel, soldiers are wearing the eye patches. Again, is there a reason for this? Does it perhaps help with the Silence in some way?

And we keep on hearing that “silence will fall when the question is asked”. Now, the idea that silence will fall can be interpreted in two ways. Firstly, it could mean that the world/universe fall silent, or fall to the silence. That’s probably the obvious way to take those words. But, there is another way – that the Silence will fall in the same way that the Roman Empire fell; in other words, this marks their last stand. Which then leads us to ask “what is the question?” Personally, I’ve spent a lot of the past few weeks thinking someone is going to ask the Doctor “who are you?” That’s a question that is as old as time (or the show, anyway). Now I suspect that the question could be, again addressed to the Doctor, “will you marry me?” After all, River is meant to be killing the Doctor – if she actually turns it on its head and proposes to him, that will end the schemes of the Silence pretty effectively.

On that note – it now seems almost certain that the impossible astronaut is River. Yet… I wouldn’t put it past Moffat to actually put someone else in that space suit. In fact, I wouldn’t be surprised if it is the Doctor in there. The Doctor killing the Doctor… to make his enemies, who have pursued him across time and space and done irreparable damage to so many people in the process, believe him to be dead. Can there be two different Doctors? Well, yeah – and ever since the ending to The Almost People I’ve been expecting the return of the Flesh Doctor (actually, the Almost Doctor sounds better than the Flesh Doctor…)

Of course, if it is the Almost Doctor being killed/replacing the Real Doctor, then I’ll probably be a bit disappointed. Then again, that is the biggest problem facing this episode – by killing off the lead character in the opening episode of this season, Moffat has made a rod for his own back. He’ll have to pull off something pretty astounding to avoid making at least some of the viewers feel cheated. Yet he is the king (at least in the world of Doctor Who) of involved plotting. I’d be surprised if he had entered into the idea of killing the Doctor without working out how to bring him back. If anyone can pull off something pretty bloody spectacular, it will be Moffat. And I’m very much looking forward to seeing what he has got to offer us.

And one final prediction? Lots of people will end up disappointed. Even if Moffat has written the single best episode of Doctor Who of all time, people will still find something to carp on about. Fine, that’s the nature of the beast. I just hope that people go into the episode with an open mind, and see what Moffat has in store for us. The general feeling should be one of excitement; not an expectation of disappointment.