Derek Draper

The Labour party have found the answer to all of their problems. In the (highly unlikely) form of Derek Draper. Draper is a Nu Labour drone turned psychotherapist who is now going to help Labour on a voluntary basis. What can he bring to the Nu Labour table, I hear you ask?

Draper, whose psychotherapy website describes him as "experienced at treating emotional and psychological issues including: self-esteem, personal development, depression, anxiety, addictions, self-harm, personality problems and family and relationship concerns", will advise Labour on how to win the next election.

Not so sure, if his boasts are to be believed, that he would be best served helping Labour win the election. In fact, if he is a decent psychotherapist, his main focus should be on helping the increasingly insane Prime Minister get through the day.

Anyhoo, the man who has employed Draper (albeit on an unpaid basis) has this to say about his hiring:

"To help with all this I have asked Derek Draper to work with me on a voluntary part-time basis ... Derek ... will be assisting me in thinking through where we need to go organisationally to ensure our campaigning in the next few years matches our past best. I believe we can achieve this goal, despite our financial challenges, if all sections of the party work together."

The problem, of course, is getting all sections of the party to work together. And I rather suspect it will take more than just Draper to make that happen.

After all, who would want to work together with Gordon Brown?